Nathan sat at the cafe a little longer that day. Hana had to leave about 10min ago. Nathan sat and thought a while. He pulled out his journal and began to write. Today marks the start of something exciting and new, he wrote. Continuing he says, Hana and I can make a great team, but it reminds me a lot of that other thing, not too too long ago. He sat, twirling his pen in his fingers and scraping it against his face. He has not thought about this in some time now. Life was completely different. It was something he had never dreamed or planned, but it just kind of happened. The original plan was a week, it's been four months now.
The four months wasn't the plan either. It was from a week to a month after four days. The week didn't feel long enough. Nathan had to change his voicemail greeting, settle in, and look into different visa options at the end of that month. At the end of that month, he decided he would do his teacher training the following month. He got his yoga teacher certification, then he kept up his daily yoga practice at a local studio. He starting teaching some yoga, but there's not much money in it at the beginning.
Nathan has now been here for four months, and the cafe idea is now what he's thinking about. While he sits and stares at the page, the words that other thing stand out to him, and his mind goes to the past. He is transported to the other side of the world, memories of another life, feeling like a lifetime ago. He had a partner, and after making serious commitments, she left. He was left to pick up the pieces of what they'd started. It feels like a miracle in hindsight they didn't have children, but there was good long period where that felt like a missed opportunity to stay connected. The business, another way to stay connected. A friendship, just another way to stay connected. Nathan realizes that hindsight brings the clarity and presence he wished was present in those moments where he needed it. His realization has come in many forms, and today's doesn't bring tears like it did last year.
The memories are stuck with him, but today, instead of torturing himself for mistakes, he reminds himself of the lessons learned. Nathan is quick to speak kind words to himself, you're were doing your best, good job learning those lessons and getting through that, I'm proud of the progress you've made, no stress, no rush, just keep going from here.
Nathan learned through a lot of work how the past can be a tool to shape the future, and the future can be a tool to shape the present. He can't claim that he understands much of this, but he ponders while sitting and staring at the rest of that page. He writes, I found myself at a crossroads again. The world has asked me to trust someone. I wonder if I am able to trust myself this time. I wonder how I can trust myself. I wonder how this other person will make things better. I wonder how much better life is going to be now. Whoa now, let's not get so grandiose with life being better. It's an exciting new plan, and the work sounds like fun today. How will we handle it when the work is not fun anymore? How will we handle our friendship if we stop having fun? Lots of questions, and all I know is that it will all work out because we just keep moving forward and having fun along the way.
As he looked up from the page, he noticed, in what felt like the first time again, the aliveness of the world around him. The people were going somewhere, all seemingly in a hurry. Bicycles, motorbikes, scooters, and cars were hustling through the streets, and no shortage of people walking either. It was as if the streets had their own life, and the people were only a part of how these streets experienced their days. Each individual unique, each moment unique. Nathan let his mind wander for a moment on these thoughts. He looked in the busy street and got lost in the seductive dance of the traffic patterns. He was snapped out of this trance when the waiter came by to ask if he needed anything.
Nathan asked for one more coffee and to pay the bill. He likes to pay the bill and get a final drink so that he's not rushed to leave, and he can leave without notice when the time comes. It is typical for Nathan to pay the bill long before he is ready to leave. The prepayment gives him a perceived freedom. Probably some childhood traumas contributing, but today isn't the day for healing the inner child.
The waiter came back with the coffee and the check. Nathan had cash, so he paid and tipped the young man bringing the coffee. Now, he can add sugar to his coffee and sit for another minute to drink it.
Nathan added the single packet of sugar to the coffee. There's a system, one cup means one sugar, and that is adjusted accordingly. Although a double espresso still only receives one sugar. He made this system up years ago, and it serves his shorthand well, even if he gets strange looks when asking for one sugar, white sugar if possible. If he had more money, Nathan might be described as eccentric. Unfortunately, he's kinda broke so people might think he's a little special instead.
Nathan stirred the coffee and looked around again. The rush of the street faded by now. It was a moment, and that moment will stay with him, but the moment is gone. He sees the other tables lining the street. He's not the only one sitting outside drinking coffee in this town. Nathan has tried to learn the local language but not with a purpose. He only got through the basics. He has justified this with not wanting to muddy the waters with his other language learning. He thinks it's reasonable. He's not looking for ways to be able to do it all. This is enough.
He is looking for ways to deepen some of his yoga practice. These thoughts run through his mind as he sips his coffee. He also gives his imagination the permission to dream about the cafe. It will have outdoor seating, like this one, of course. It will have those kind of folding chairs that we can bring inside when it rains, and when we close. The indoor area will consists of about 10 tables for four people each. Then it will have a few booths. People will come and visit and spend time with each other in the main dining area. We will have an open space in the back. It is outdoor, but it is covered and doesn't get wet when it rains.
The covered space out back is used for small yoga classes. It fits a teacher plus eight student mats. Six students is a little more comfortable, but the classes are usually packed when Hana or Nathan are teaching. There will also be events held in the space. When there is no class, there will be a concert or a game night, trivia night too. The cafe serves very light food. This is mostly sandwiches, and there are a couple items that work well in the microwave. But mostly, the coffee and the drinks are the main drivers of the business. The cafe turns into a bar in the evenings. The bar is packed with people after their yoga class, locals relaxing after work, and tourists looking for a good vibe. The regulars aren't just one group.
A honking car brings Nathan back to this moment. He had been sipping the coffee and didn't realize until now that it was empty. His fantasy had taken the whole of his attention. For now, the coffee was done, and he had places to be. His afternoon yoga session was coming up next. There was no rush though. Nathan had more than an hour to show up at this class. He was ready in his current clothes, and his mat was already there. He set himself up for success, he remembered. That was all part of the plan, and he gave himself a little pat on the back, thinking to himself, Thank you for thinking ahead, Nathan, good job.
Nathan left the coffee shop with a little smile and a spring in his step. After all, he grinned even wider, Hana teaches today's yoga class.