There was an interesting discussion about this very concept, and that discussion couldn't be more timely or relevant to what we have going on here. The concept of "being fine" is a difficult one to wrap our heads around while we are in the center of the hurricane of life. Life sucks, and we must remain vigilant and mindful throughout the process to remain sane.

We call life a "process" because life is a process that cannot be taken lightly. We work and weave our way through the ups and downs; we navigate the rough seas and captain this ship. We discussed previously and only touched on the idea. Let's take a moment to elucidate the contours of the concept.

When does life get complicated? Well, from the beginning, of course. At the moment of birth, complication sets in. Walking and talking are complicated tasks. Working those little arms and putting toes in mouth, these are where the complication sets in. It is truly more complicated when we add people. Hold on now. Is life complicated without other people? This is possibly the source of complication.

It could be simple if we just got what we wanted all the time. That might not be true. I cannot say whether it would be so complicated if there were only one person. If I were the last person on earth, would I have such troubles? In the zombie-apocalypse movies, life doesn't get any less complicated. In other post-apocalyptic films, the complication still exists (people involved). We can look to fiction and use those tiny minds of ours to think through possibilities. Fallout was a good video game that shows how complicated people can be. There was never a change, and there has been a change in this concept. Oh, what tragedy awaits us. There is simple pleasure and there is complicated pleasure. I am not one to seek long, drawn-out revenge plots. That shit's exhausting.

I choose not to go out of my way to harm another person. No matter the slight I have received, it does not benefit me or the world around me to seek a tit-for-tat mentality. I can let it go, and I will be better for having taken that action. I am not of the mind that we should go around thinking about all the people who have taken action against us. It is possible to live without such thoughts, and it is equally possible to live the opposite. We get the choice of path at this crossroads. I have chosen the higher path (or is it the left path?).

It happened to me recently where someone took affirmative action to harm me. I was resilient in the face of this intentional harm, and I was not harmed. I have plenty to do, and being alone while I do it is just fine with me. I do well by myself. I do well with others. I would choose to be with others, and in that, I choose to take moments for myself. I won't waste my energy thinking about the person who harmed me. I will spend my energy on worthwhile ventures.

That said, I may take moments to share the story as a moment of personal growth in hopes others may grow from my experience. Don't take it personally when others slight you. They needed that. They needed something. It wasn't as though you lost anything. You actually gained. You now know how that person will treat people. I would not make such a decision. I would not take such action. I choose to pursue and befriend those who want the best for me. I want the best for everyone. I pray that person will find the peace they so desperately need. It's none of my business how they live. I can move away, out of the way. I can change my thoughts and make new choices. It is within my power to make decisions for me. Why would I make active decisions to harm another person? In defense of life and family and friends, I would harm another. Killing is not a bad thing. It is just a thing. But, if we are to make plans to harm another, that is bad for ourselves.

I have the desire to leave this world behind. I can make the choice. I have the power and the ability to do and be better. Be best! I haven't taken action toward this choice. It is mostly because I feel an obligation to stick around and help.

Writing for the rest of my life (that's not a complete sentence, let it be). I only say some things to see reactions. These words don't add up to the intended meaning, but go with me. I had a thing that I cared for. That thing is gone. Fill in the blank for yourself. You have those things also. It could be a person, it could be an opportunity, it could be myself, or the pieces I've lost, the sacrifices I unknowingly made. Too late now. I wasn't voluntarily giving up these things, they were lost along the way. They may have been lost to indifference, or they may have been lost due to ignorance. It only matters how they were lost if I stop to blame myself. I can accept the fact of loss and move forward without.

There is nothing permanent in this world. Everything we have is borrowed. Fancy car, beautiful wife, fun toys, and the ground we walk upon, these are all temporary. Most of all, we are temporary. This realization is freeing. It allows us to enjoy this present moment. Nothing is truly lost, but everything is lost. This dichotomy is difficult for me to grasp. I struggle with the idea that I cannot cling to things. I'm clingy. I want no change. I like what I have. But this doesn't work. I cannot continue in the same spot because I cannot change the temporal nature of things. I must accept the temporary and cherish it. I look forward to the next blooming rose.

I will try something this morning. I am going to write a thought on a piece of paper. I will then burn that piece of paper. This will put my thoughts into the world. This will put the idea into the universe, and I hope it brings the happiness for the person I wish this upon.

It's all okay. Let it go. Things return to us without the need for us to hold so tightly. A light touch in love is my chosen route. And I will continue to tell myself, keep going. You're going to be just fine.

This is Learning Made Hard.